Top 6 discontinued foods I've loved and lost

The food industry is a merciless whore when it comes to teasing me with its comfort confections and salt-laden sins.  (Yes I'm an alliterative junkie, I also like to use parens).  It seems like every "for limited time only" product ever made becomes my temporary obsession only to be absconded due to a lack of customer appeal.  I apparently like everything that no one else does (except for crystal pepsi.  That shit just ain't right.)  Below are six favorites I've loved and lost. 

1. Barbecue "Wagon Wheels" Hamburger Helper

 "Wagon Wheels is the sheeeeeit." - Helping Hand

Outside of Lasagna, Wagon Wheels was the best HH flavor ever concocted.  I've probably eaten twice my body weight of it over my lifetime until the day it just disappeared (like my six-pack abs).  You might find this as a surprise, but Hamburger Helper has actually discontinued 12 different brands since its humble beginnings in 1971.  * - Courtesy of Wikipedia

• Beef Romanoff (still available in Canada)
• Beef and Garlic Potatoes
• Beef Stew
• Cheddar & Broccoli
• Hash
• Macaroni & Cheese
• Meatloaf
• Pizza Bake
• Rice Oriental (Officially discontinued, but occasionally still available in some stores)
• Wild Rice & Mushrooms
• Wagon Wheels (also called "Barbecue" aka the best damn flavor ever)
• Zesty Mexican 

Betty Crocker, you can suck it.

2. Inside out Kit-Kat bars

 Oh yeah, break me off a piece of that

Oh. my. god.  I first found these little delight in an Albertson's across the street from my apartment in Tulsa in 2004 I believe.  It was simple, ingenious, and love at first taste.  The Inside Out Kit Kat bar was just like a regular Kit Kat except the outside was white chocolate and the inside was chocolate creme with chocolate wafers.  I'm pretty sure I bought out the store at least once when I found out it limited edition.  As it turns out, the much lamer and less inventive white chocolate Kit Kat also started out limited edition until consumer demand made it a permanent edition to the family.  I'm still waiting for a re-up, don't hold out on me, Kit Kat.

3. Chef Boyardee Tortellinis

The best value for your hard earned food stamps

Actually, I'm not even sure if they've been discontinued, but I can't find the canned tortellinis anywhere anymore.  They were the only canned pasta I ever ate.  The only ones I can find are beef raviolis, cheese raviolis, overstuffed raviolis, mini-raviolis, and beefaroni.  Do you know what's better than canned ravioli?  If your answer was more canned ravioli, you're in luck.  Maybe I don't want canned ravioli, Chef.  Did you ever think of that?  Maybe I wanted canned tortellini, dammit.  There's a difference!

Fun fact - spaghettios.com redirects you to myslurp.com.  Whoever thought up that genius name probably thought up a dozen different types of ravioli too.

4. Triple Cheese and Bacon - Arby's

[The perfect sandwich goes here]

I'd find a picture, but I don't want you to cry yourself to sleep over a sandwich.

Do you know what's better than thinly sliced roast beef, bacon, melted cheddar cheese, parmesan sauce, and a slice of swiss?  Nothing.  The Arby's Triple Cheese and Bacon was the best sandwich that's ever come out of a fast food restaurant.  And I'm an expert because I worked at Arby's and I had literally everything on the menu at least twice.  (This was before those disgusting onion petals became a side item).  This was the sandwich that could make a vegetarian relapse, a PETA member recant, and a regular person regurgitate just to eat it again.  It was that good.  You can still make a double cheese and bacon if you really wanted to, but it's just not the same.

5. Viennetta

One slice is never enough

If you're above the age of 20, you probably remember the commercials (click the link) for Viennetta.  It wasn't just another ice cream, it was the Rolls Royce of ice creams.  The commercials always featured a refined gentleman's voiceover and an atmosphere of fine dining.  In fact, it was a requirement to eat it with your pinky up in the air knowing you had climbed out of ice cream obscurity and into the lap of luxury.  As it turns out, this product was only discontinued in the United States.  Much like universal healthcare, legal prostitution, and college-educated citizens, we'll have to go overseas to find a good Viennetta fix.

6. Olive Garden's Chocolate Lasagna

Heaven's only dessert

I saved the best for last.  Olive Garden's famous chocolate lasagna also known as the best dessert I've ever had in my life.  (Sorry Don Pablo's chocolate volcano, you were only my mistress)  Layer after layer of moist chocolate cake, butter cream, chocolate cake, butter cream, chocolate cake, butter cream, CHOCOLATE CHUNKS.  I still remember the last time I had chocolate lasagna. . . .it was in Tulsa.  ::sigh::  I boycotted the Olive Garden for years afterward, but admittedly I've relapsed.  I still hate Olive Garden's decision to remove it from their menu though.  I cannot believe it wasn't popular enough to stay.  There are online petitions and facebook groups devoted to bringing it back, not to mention pages after pages of copycat recipes.  I want my wedding cake to be one giant chocolate lasagna.  If I had three wishes, one of them would be to have an endless supply of chocolate lasagna at my disposal.  My last meal on death row would end in a chocolate lasagna.

What discontinued foods have you loved and lost?